Bryan Down Under
by The JohhnyMcKilt Productions
Summary: [challenge fic for Natty Colombian Girl]They were made for each other! Bryan had the lock and Sanguinex had the key. But how on earth will these two EVER meet?
1. Prolouge

A/N: (for Natty) I changed my mind about this being a Oneshot! I had too much fun writing this! (for the rest) …enjoy!xD

**Bryan Down Under**

_**Prologue**_

"My child…" began the Grand High Lord, whos name was so sacred even the very demons he ruled over were forbidden to speak it. "I have called you from the upper world for a special reason."

Sanguinex stared at the pitch black floor, bit his lip and shifted a smidgen. Being summoned by his King was never a comfortable experience.

"As you are now of age," continued the great man. "The time has come for me to pass on to you a family heirloom."

He gave the undead redhead a curious iron key.

"W-what is it, sire?" Sanguinex asked timidly.

"That!" was the booming reply. "…holds the answer to the meanings you seek."

The teen stared at the unlikely object with an elegantly raised eyebrow. The Grand High Lord saw this and chuckled deeply.

"I know it may not be much," he added in a low, more fatherly tone. "But the thing works every time. Through the years it's been in this family, it has never let us down…"

"Uh…thank you…" the redhead replied.

"Use it well and keep it safe!"

Sanguinex shrugged. "I will if you say so, your Highness…don't worry." He smiled politely at the man before bowing low and leaving.

--

"It's a rite Bryan…"

"I won't do it!"

"Keep his legs apart Tala!"

"I'm trying to Kai!"

"I said I'm NOT DOING IT!"

Their tangy-haired team captain sighed and put his hands on his hips. "Look Bry, Kai 'n I are on Boris' orders. Voltaire sent a memo that says…" he fished out a sheet of paper from his pocket and read it for reference. "…and I quote 'My boys, tis tradition that every fair-haired maiden must become a disciple of the moon. Since I have no maidens and Kuznetsov is the only worth fair-haired individual, he shall have to suffice. Service to the moon requires wearing this chastity belt to preserve virginity…' so stay put and we'll strap it on!"

"NO!"

"Fine…" said Kai. "Give me a good reason…"

"…it'll hurt…"

The bluenette groaned. "You can do better than that…"

"…Alright…HOW ON EARTH WILL I PEE?!"

"That's YOUR problem!" exclaimed Tala, heaving the thick iron brief on the table where Bryan was. "Come ON! Let's get little Jimmy in this thing…"

"It'll just be like putting on permanent diapers!" the redhead's best friend cooed as his slipped a valiantly struggling teen into the contraption.

With a heavy click, the steel underwear was on.

"Wait," added Tala and he secured everything with a big iron padlock. "Says in the memo if you want to leave the moon's service, you have to be deflowered in her presence by your one true…and the ink got smudged."

"Are you snug?" Kai asked the lilac-haired Russian.

"Go to Hell…" was the snarling reply as he tried to stand and almost fell over at the belt's weight. "Godamnnit, how much does this thing weigh?!"

"Less than a ton, I suppose…" the bluenette answered.

"Now this is supposed to be a secret," Tala interrupted before blood was shed as he was seemingly engrossed in the given instructions.

"Not anymore by the racket we made…" muttered Bryan.

"…you mean by the racket YOU made," corrected Kai cheerfully.

"HIWATARI!"

"OI! You two shut UP!" their team captain yelped. "Let's just walk out here like nothing happened or else the Bosses are gonna get my ass!"

"Better your ass than mine…"

"KUZNETSOV!"

It was kind of hard to walk exactly when you were wearing underwear heavier than you.

**TBC**

A/N: …y'all get the point when I said I had lotza fun with this…x3 don't kill me and tell me what you think! …enjoy!xD and ciAo…


	2. Chapter 1

acad paper

A/N: Oh. My. Gosh! I am so terribly SORRY for not updating for so long! I feel just horrible for making you guys wait. You see, my summer was busier than I expected, I couldn't find time to be on the computer! I couldn't even find time to write…I hope you'd all understand ((in a year _kasi_ I'll be in college so life has grown pretty stressful lately)). Once more I am so SORRY!!! Updates are finally here! I hope the wait was worth it…enjoy!xD

For Natty…about Bryan's bit. They ((as in Tala and Kai)) just made him wear iron underwear so that he could remain a virgin because Voltaire ordered it to be so.x3

**Bryan Down Under**

_**Chapter One**_

A pensive Sanguinex absently entered his team's apartment back in London. The room was eerily dark and the vampire frowned. It looked like no one was home, yet he wasn't informed of any activities that required the outside world…

…that was until the lights went up and his fellow undead friends popped out form behind the various furniture like daisies and yelled, "HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!" finished by a pathetic 'toot' from a part accessory.

Unbelievably enough, the redhead wasn't surprised. Sure he was mildly freaked out but besides that, he didn't react much. His younger brother noticed the mien and approached him.

"What did father ask of you?" Lupinex queried.

The elder shrugged. "Nothing…"

"Father?" came Cenotaph. "I thought you were called by the Grand High Lord."

"The Grand High Lord IS our father…" the werewolf pointed out and Zomb's eyes bulged.

"No way!" he exclaimed. "Can we get your autograph?"

Sanguinex snorted. "He DID give me this…" and the teen held out the iron key for his friends to see. "He told me that now I'm of age, this heirloom could be passed on to me."

"What is it?" asked the youngest undead blankly.

"It's a key…" the mummy replied simply and moved away to partake of the birthday food.

"I may be dead Cen, but I'm not stupid!" the greenette whined a followed the blonde.

"Really Sang," Lupinex continued. "What is it?"

"Father told me this would be the answer to…er…the 'meanings' I seek," was the reply.

"'Meanings'? Well then this heirloom wouldn't be much help to you, would it?" remarked Cenotaph from the kitchen.

Sanguinex shook his head. "No…it wouldn't. But now that the subject's been brought up it'd be nice if I'd come up with a solution once and for all."

His three mates looked at him sadly. You see, the redhead had been depressed for the past few weeks. Upon numerous and heated heart-to-heart discussions not only with the team but also with their former rivals, the Majestics, his problem was about love. Sanguinex wanted a significant other.

"Father doesn't know what I'm going through…" he looked at the key with bitterness. "Most likely I'm going to forget about this…" and with that the object was stowed away in a random pocket.

"As for your problem," said his gray-haired brother. "You could go talk to Robert again and see if he's made progress in looking for the person he could arrange you with."

"I admire Robert sometimes," Zomb lightly commented aside.

Cenotaph nodded. "He does too much."

"Those dates are getting useless…" the vampire said exasperatedly. "It's not exactly easy for a person like me to hook up with someone. Not one of those people I go out with are my type!"

"Tell Robert then," interjected Lupinex. "The thing is with you is that you aren't telling him anything, leaving him no choice but to throw whatever goes at you."

Sanguinex was silenced.

--

"Why didn't you TELL me the dates weren't working?" a certain German asked incredulously.

"I'm sorry to have caused the inconvenience…don't RUB IT IN!!!" replied his visitor.

Sanguinex was in the Jurgen castle's living room, being entertained with tea and buttered scones as the Majestics sat around him.

"Do you have a preference already?" Johnny asked.

"A what?"

"Something like a crush…" translated Enrique.

The vampire screwed up his eyebrows in thought. "It feels like it…but I don't know who."

"Is it someone we know?" tried Oliver, but the undead teen shrugged.

"Try using gut feel," suggested the Scot. "It always works."

"Name people," said Sanguinex. "You might come across it…"

"Let's see," Robert began. "Is it Tyson?"

The other shook his head.

"Rei?"

"No."

"Max? Lee?"

"…it's none of the Asians."

There was an 'oh' and the purple haired man thought for a moment.

"Is it Michael?"

"No."

"Emily?"

"It isn't a girl."

Lavender-lilac eyes of the youngest Majestic widened and he whispered something into his team captain's ear.

"Is it Kai?" Robert continued.

"No…" Sanguinex answered.

"Tala?"

"No."

"Spencer?" by the tone of his voice it was clear even he thought the guesses were absurd.

"No."

"Ian?"

"No."

"…Bryan?"

There was a pause.

Enrique smiled expectantly as the prolonged wait for the answer commenced. As soon as the beginnings of a blush flowered on the vampire's pale cheeks did Johnny punch the air.

"Wrong move, Sang!" he declared encouragingly.

The snob and the playboy laughed their heads off and Robert sighed.

"Your problem's worse than I thought…"

**TBC**

A/N: I hope you liked that…hehe. Keep hangin' on for the next installment…and I promise you guys won't have to wait that long. You're all very much appreciated! …enjoy!xD and ciAo…


	3. Chapter 2

A/N:…well, you asked for it so I'm not letting you down! Thanks for the support on this story!! …enjoy!xD

**Bryan Down Under**

_**Chapter Two**_

Boris had ordered all the rooms in the Abbey to be searched. Voltaire's lucky, half-eaten corndog had been stolen from its moldy, ancient casket. He figured out one of the priso—students might have eaten it in desperation to be fed.

The Blitzkrieg Boys were given the task of searching the bedrooms. As even in the strict confines of the training institution, one or two hardheads may have sneaked in a couple of illegal items.

So Tala found himself sweeping Kai's neat, tidy room.

There wasn't anything suspicious…the space was as Kai-ish as it could be. The walls were still varying shades of army and dark blues. The floor was still pale gray cement (as all floors of the Abbey went) that changed temperature according to the weather. The wooden dressing table was still to the left. Its three wide drawers still contained tops, pants, shoes and accessories folded or kept symmetrically as far as Kai's OCness went.

To the right there still lay his rectangular bed made out of foam and steel frames. The only items that adorned it were a small blue goose-feather pillow, a thick, neatly folded blanket, a stuffed wolf Tala himself gave him on Christmas and a soft stuffed cat that squirted water from a hole in its ass when pressed.

Two convenient plastic cases still lay under the bed. Cologne, deo, aftershave and what not were stored in the first. In the second, Kai kept his phone, wallet, car kayes, cond—and other secret stuff that needed hiding.

Nothing out of the ordinary with Kai's room…

…except…

With his broom, Tala poked about more under the bed. It met a rag, or at least he thought it WAS a rag.

Knowing it wasn't usual of Kai to keep rags, the redhead went down on his knees and reached for it to pull it out.

It was a kilt.

Baby blue eyes hardened to ice. No one in the Abbey wore a kilt; they weren't allowed to in the first place. Tala had not been told of a sudden fascination for cultural garments, and the only person they knew who had a kilt was more than a couple countries away.

Unless Kai was cheating on his through a long distance relationship, there was no reason for that kilt to be in his room.

Wait a minute…Kai COULD have a secret LDR. The filthy bastard was cheating on him for a temperamental man-wearing skirt! …I mean skirt-wearing man! The discovery was simply unacceptable.

"Bryan!" the Blitzkrieg captain barked at the lilac-haired teen thoroughly enjoying ransacking Ian's room.

"Hm?" asked the virgin, poking his fuzzy head out the door.

"WHERE is Hiwatari?" Tala demanded.

"Searching Alexander's room down the hall," said Bryan. "Why? Did you find the corndog? Because if you did give me a minute, I want to see more of what the shrimp's got in his stash…"

The redhead's frown deepened. "I didn't find the stupid corndog. But I found something else that will get him in greater trouble…with me." And abandoning his work, the pale teen marched straight to where his boyfriend was, grasping the checked skirt tightly in his fist.

Kai Hiwatari was curiously examining a collection of bottles when the angry, stomping sound of all-too-familiar boots jolted him out of his occupation. He turned around to acknowledge the visitor.

To his surprise, a madly jerking, levitating kilt met him instead. In a quick whoosh it was gone, revealing a really pissed Ivanov behind it.

"What is this?" he spat.

"It's a kilt," the bluenette calmly answered.

"I know it's a kilt! Don't be an ass Hiwatari! Why is it here? What is it doing under your bed? And WHO did it come from?!"

"Calm down, 'La…I borrowed that from Johnny for one of Voltaire's mandatory talent shows."

"…but that was over ten months ago."

"I forgot about it and returning it."

Tala didn't seem convinced and the other boy sighed.

"Look," assured the latter. "If you think I'm cheating on you, trust me I'd rather wear tights, a chastity belt and dye my hair green than do that." He gently took the skirt from his captain. "If it bothers you so much I'll return it."

"Do it." Tala commanded. "Do it right now, Kai. Get in you hang glider, roller blades, yacht, whatever! Just get that thing out of my sight. I'll cover for you."

The two toned bluenette hesitated for a moment before shrugging and walking out the bedroom. Within hours, he was in Germany.

--

Contrary to what most people see of the Jurgen Castle when they ride in hot air balloons, the residence actually looked as bright and welcoming as a villa in the South of France.

Upon entering the lot, Kai beheld a vast front lawn sporadically dotted with glittering fountains and mahogany trees. Though it didn't look like it, the house was guarded by one of the most advanced security systems. The visiting Russian was absolutely wary of any hidden triggers.

…but then his alertness became slightly less sharp when he saw Enrique encasing his face in an odd glass contraption that looked like it had been yanked out on an old window.

The blonde waved enthusiastically but didn't come over. Instead he pointed to the massive double oak front doors before lying down on the grass facing the sun and resuming whatever…ritual he was performing.

Kai stared for a moment before resolutely walking up to the entrance. He looked at the package he was carrying with a sigh and pushed the doorbell.

"Gustav," he heard Robert's mild voice say. "Could you g—"

"NO!" interjected a younger voice that sounded like Oliver. "I want to answer the door!"

"Oh Oliver you KNOW no one would fall for that…" the German sounded exasperated.

"Just you wait."

Footfalls were heard coming closer and closer. Kai jumped and backed up a bit when one of the dorss suddenly swung open in his face.

"Bonjour, Cannibal Pizza Palace," greeted the French boy. "We eat door-to-door salesmen, how may we help you?"

The two toned bluenette didn't know what to reply. "…uhm."

Lavender lilac eyes widened when he saw who he was actually talking to. "Oh hi Kai! I didn't know it was you…come in. Haha…forget what you heard, we were just in the mood for playing pranks."

"Did you scare him off?" called Johnny from further in the house.

"No, it's only Kai," the greenette called back.

"Kai?!" Robert sounded surprised.

"So…" began the Russian. "All of you are here?"

"Yes," said Oliver, ushering him to the living room. "We've just recently had a visit from the Dark Bladers—"

"Wait, may I just ask what exactly is Enrique doing outside?" the other queried in low tones.

The young chef dismissed any absurd thoughts with the casual flip of his hand. "Don't mind him. He's trying to grow a beard."

"Wha--? How? Why can't he just…not shave?"

"Beats me. 'Rique says that's how they grew it fast back in the day. Anyway, where was I? Oh yes the Dark Bladers."

"I thought your team and theirs where rivals," said Kai, only too clearly remembering his encounters with them during his first World Championships.

"Well, only in front of the dish," answered Oliver. "Otherwise, we're good friends. Lately, Sanguinex has been having problems with his love life. Robert's trying to help him out—"

"Are you telling Kai about Sang?" asked Johnny.

The pair finally reached Robert's spacious study. The Scot had been looking over his team captain's shoulder as they searched the internet for something. Upon the Hiwatari heir's arrival, they decided to wrap up.

"Kai!" Robert greeted airily. "What brings you here?"

The bluenette was yanked back to the purpose of his trip. "Oh right," he said and presented the package containing the kilt. "Here's you kilt, Johnny. I forgot to return it. Tala found it under my bed and got pissed because he thought I was cheating…"

"On him?" the redhead exclaimed, taking the garment. "That's priceless! And thanks by the way…I almost forgot about his."

"Have some refreshment," invited the purple-haired man. "You must've had a long trip. Is this all you came for?"

Kai helped himself to a cookie and some milk tea brought in by the butler. "Actually yeah that's all I came for…but what's this I hear about Sanguinex's love life? He has a love life?"

"More complicated than you know!" said Oliver. "Oh tell him what happened Rob!"

The German took time to drink his tea and place the cup on the coffee table.

"At first he told me he wanted a significant other, for he felt quite incomplete. So I fixed him up for hundreds of dates to see if he'd like anyone. The routine went on for quite a period of time before Sang said that the dates weren't working at all. He said he felt like he had a crush but wasn't sure. That was what we talked about a few days ago. It went like this…"

**TBC**

A/N: forgive typos…I was in a hurry…next chap soon! …enjoy!xD and ciAo…


	4. Chapter 3

A/N: To everyone who reads this...especially Natty...I'm EXTREMELY SORRY for the delay! ...I really hope this chapter is worth the wait...enjoy!xD

**Bryan Down Under**

_**Chapter Three**_

"And what do you mean by that?" asked Sanguinex, quite hurt after having been told by Robert that having a crush on Bryan Kuznestov was a bad problem.

"It isn't you..." assured the German with a lazy flick of the wrist. "It's him. He's a really hard catch."

"A tough cookie!" added Johnny.

"The impenetrable wall!" sighed Oliver dreamily.

"The man with no tickle," said Enrique.

Four heads turned to him with '?!' written all over their faces.

"What?" the blonde asked. "I'll give you a backyard fountain if that isn't true..."

"Well, anyway," Robert continued. "Most people who've gotten crushes on Bryan abandon their cause. Other idiots who push through though, get humiliatingly turned down. Knowing you, I'm sure you're neither, Sang?" he smiled.

The vampire shook his head. "I've made up my heart. I DO like Bryan, and as sure as yeah I'd kill to make him mine."

The noble was a tad bit alarmed at the sudden energy. "Let's try not to take this to the next level, okay? For now it's Kuznetsov 101."

He turned to his team mates for help. "Mind chipping in?"

"To start off, he's from the Blitzkrieg Boys," the Italian began with a smirk. "Well, formerly known as the Demolition Boys under Boris' management, but come to think of it, the names pretty much mean the same thing. Bryan's got green-blue eyes and lilac colored hair—"

"Oh come off in Giancarlo!" said Robert. "Tell us something we don't know!"

"Shush!" said Oliver. "It's the basics. He likes wearing fur and tight-fitting or short things..."

"High combat boots not to mention," Johnny added with some enthusiasm. "He isn't much of a talker but when he does, he sure talks tough."

"He's got a hairy chest!" the greenette squealed.

His best friend's jaw dropped. The others looked none too surprised.

"How would you know THAT?!" Enrique accused.

The Frenchman giggled. "Since he's from Russia, you know...Europe...I deduced that his bodily structure would adapt to the cold."

"Oliver," said Sanguinex, trying to follow the youngest Majestic's train of thought. "WE'RE from Europe. You don't see any of US ripping our tops in half and flaunting chest hair..."

"Argh!" groaned the German as the Highlander beside him erupted in peals of laughter. "Bryan isn't THAT old yet!"

"Sometimes I seriously don't think you're a boy," the blonde told Oliver, which earned him a whack.

"Got anymore remotely useful information?" asked their guest vampire as he rose a red eyebrow at Johnny who had hit the floor and was rolling on the carpet.

"I do," sighed Robert. "He enjoys the company of his team...well, I'm not sure about Ian because he's annoying as HELL, but I'm positive that there's a mutual connection. The subject about the Abbey, captivity, torture and imprisonment are definitely sensitive and therefore make BAD conversations. Bryan likes politics though, and being up to date with current events around the globe. Damned nationalistic, him. But he's open to decent, relatively intelligent discussions about history."

"I take it you know all this because you've actually had such a conversation?" came Johnny, who had finally recovered.

The purple-haired man reddened slightly. "He's actually very good company if you know how to play your cards right. Unless he deems you someone not worth his time (take Daichi for example), he's an approachable guy. Once, he and Kenny bonded so-to-speak for a whole afternoon just talking about motorbikes!"

Sanguinex grew uneasy. "My sentiments exactly," he said. "What if he, quote, deemed me as someone unworthy of his time? What could we possibly have a conversation about?"

"Do you like food?" Oliver asked sweetly. "Rei Kon told me Bryan likes home cooked meals and could do one hell of a stir-fry."

"Or music," Enrique suggested. "You two could talk about music."

"But you haven't told me what music he likes," said the vampire with a slight whine.

"If I remember correctly," continued the Roman. "He likes...Fall Out Boy, My Chemical Romance, Linkin Park, Simple Plan, All American Rejects...hates Pop and RnB, with some few exeptions (like hiphop). Oh and he likes L'Arcenciel..."

Sanguinex frowned. "Those guys who sung Ready, Steady, Go from Fullmetal Alchemist?"

"Yeah," replied the French boy. "And Driver's High from Great Teacher Onizuka..."

"Was it them?" asked his short-tempered team mate. "I though it was Porno Graffiti."

"No, they sung the other song, Hitori No Yoru..."

"You two could talk about FMA..." Robert told the lovesick undead teen beside him, steering the conversation before it got lost elsewhere. "...or Gravitation or Evangelion or something violent and bloody..."

"Wolf's Rain and Texhnolyze," answered the young chef among the party. "Their violent and bloody..."

His best friend looked scandalized (again). "You watch those?!"

"Yeah...I like them. Or you could talk about Tsubasa Reservoir Chronicle..." Oliver continued suggesting.

Other heads turned to look at him.

"What?" he said. "It's intriguing! Fine! You two could talk about Yu-Gi-Oh or Digimon for a broader common ground...or Card Captor Sakura."

Johnny nodded. "Everyone enjoyed Card Captor Sakura at one point in their lives."

"Beyblade," muttered the Italian. "Might as well bring Beyblade into the lot..."

"But I don' t watch any of those..." protested Sanguinex.

"How about books?" asked the noble. "Bryan reads a wide variety of printed material."

"Harry Potter!" piped the greenette.

To Sanguinex's surprise, Enrique and Johnny yelled and covered their ears. He gave Robert an incredulous look as a silent question.

"They don't want to hear spoilers for the last book."

The redhead 'oh'-ed. They stared at each other for a few moments then at the three lunatics yelling and bouncing about.

"So..." began the vampire. "How am I actually going to get started with Bryan?"

The playboy and the hothead stopped.

"Y'know Bryan isn't exactly a vending machine people come to for decent conversations," the former observed. "We've got to have an approach...a cover story...a good excuse."

"Boy have you gotten us fired up," said his best friend sarcastically. "Any real proposals, genius?"

The five teens fell silent as they thought of how to get Sanguinex hooked up with his crush once and for all.

--

Even during Robert's narration of recent events, Kai Hiwatari was laughing his ass off.

"Sang likes Bry?" he asked disbelievingly, wiping tears of mirth from his eyes. "Now THERE'S something to do! Aw man, I've got a talk with Kuznetsov tonight!"

"Oh don't force him!" Oliver exclaimed in earnest. "Sang would never forgive you if you did!"

The Russian dismissed their doubts with a haughty look. "Don't get me wrong or anything," he said. "I won't spill right away. It's just that Bryan's needed a sort of push to get on with his love life ever since a horrible break-up with his last boyfriend. He may keep saying he isn't ready yet but damn that guy needs to be loved by someone."

The Majestics edged closer to the bluenette as his expression turned serious.

"Tala and I notice it," said Kai. "Bryan knows what he wants but doesn't know who to go about in getting it. He's never been exactly the expert on making the straight-forward move like what you guys are encouraging Sanguinex to do. It's a part of his charm, though thing is, he has the last word."

On a lighter, much disturbing note, the Russian added, "Plus he's been extremely pissed because Voltaire made him wear underwear that won't allow him to have sex for as long as he wears it...which is forever."

"What?!" yelped four voices and Kai laughed.

"Don't worry about it! Abbey inside stuff..."

There was a pathetic chuckle of appreciation.

"Sanguinex and Bryan," Johnny observed. "They'd make an odd couple, don't you think?"

"Is Sang Bry's type?" the German asked.

"Well, I don't know Sanguinex," said their guest. "I'm guessing if he's mysterious and sadistic then those two will get along just fine."

"Love moves in mysterious ways," sighed Oliver.

"Now hang on a minute," came Kai. "I'll make sure Bryan actually wants to associate himself with Sang..."

"You make it sound like it's a bad thing," frowned Enrique.

"Oh no no, Bryan likes associating himself with bad things," the bluenette replied, distracted. "Would it be alright with you guys if I tell Tal' about this so he could help?"

There was a general murmur of assent.

"Whatever rocks your boat, and thanks for the kilt again," said Johnny.

"So I guess this is thank you!" he concluded, standing up.

The four aristocrats followed the suite.

"No Kai," said Robert. "Thank YOU."

--

"Did Kai say Bryan wasn't exactly the expert on making the straight forward move?" Oliver asked once the Russian had flown back to his motherland.

"Yeah..." his three friends confirmed.

"So...he's not exactly dominant is he?"

They blinked.

**TBC**

A/N: Have a laugh...till the next! ...but I'd need to hear from y'all...enjoy!xD and ciAo...


	5. Chapter 4

A/N: Yaaagh! Finally! I swear to high heavens that the next chapter will come soon and I MEAN soon! If by **Friday**, it's not up, I'll let you readers decide my punishment...enjoy!xD

**Bryan Down Under**

_**Chapter Four**_

"Oh Tala!"

The eerily familiar singsong voice rang out through the cold stone walls of the Biovolt Abbey.

It reached the ears of a certain redhead in his room and icy baby blue eyes twitched violently.

"Kai?!" Tala exclaimed in disbelief as his blue haired boyfriend waltzed in. "My God what have they done?!"

"I've got a secret to tell you!" Kai continued in the same whimsical tone.

"Drop the voice first or I'll detonate a bomb over the Jurgen Estate!"

The other boy laughed apologetically. "Chill love! I'm sane, I'm sane."

Tala did not seem entirely convinced but dropped his guard anyway. "Okay, what's this secret?"

"Do you remember Sanguinex from the Dark Bladers?"

The question was met with a blank stare as his listener sat on his bed. "Who?"

Kai impatiently clicked his tongue. "The vampire!"

Still, it seemed not to ring a bell.

"Yeeeahhh..." the redhead began, faced scrunched up in an effort to recall. "I guess I've seen him once or two times...why?"

The two toned bluenette frowned. "Oh right, you guys didn't exactly get to know each other during Tyson's first year as World Champ. This...this is bad," he muttered more to himself than to anyone else.

Tala was further lost. "Why is it bad? Is there something important to this?"

The bluenette looked quite serious now. "Well, it's because Robert and his team told me that Sanguinex had a crush on Bryan."

"A crush on Bryan?" Tala seemed intrigued. "It's about time fur-boy got some suitors after horribly turning the rest of the old lot down. Tell me, what's this Sanguinex like?"

Kai put on a thinking face. "He's an emotionally insecure undead teenager bent on revenge by utterly defeating every person with a bitbeast."

It was Tala's turn to frown. "Gee Kai," he said in a tone that could rival Johnny's sarcasm. "I kind of got the idea that he was a bad boy since he comes from a team named Dark Bladers. I meant his attitude! We can't exactly thrust on Bry people he can't get along with..."

His boyfriend shrugged. "That IS his attitude...last I checked, at least. I hear he can be a horrible romantic though, but is quite uneasy because Robert keeps setting him up with people he doesn't know."

"Is he a virgin?"

Kai stared.

"Excuse me?"

His tangy haired lover's face was entirely straight. "I asked if Sanguinex was a virgin."

"Why?" the other boy asked incredulously. "Are you addicted to virgins too?"

Ice blue eyes regarded him without flinching. "Not exactly, but you see...Bryan's condition doesn't really call for him to be frisky with anyone."

The two toned Russian remembered. "Oh. That iron brief..."

He sat quiet on the bed for some moments. "Perhaps it won't hurt to ask Voltaire if keeping him a virgin is necessary."

Tala nodded. "This is Bryan having a chance to get a boyfriend we're talking about..."

The pair stood up and boldly made their way to the Hiwatari chairman's dreaded office.

"Hang on, have you actually seen Sanguinex?" Kai queried along the way.

"I don't know," was the reply. "Is he good-looking?"

The bluenette suppressed a snigger. "Let Bry be the judge of that..."

--

"I'm extremely sorry boys..." rumbled Voltaire. "But no matter how ridiculous and out of my line of criminal and devious expertise it may seem, I am afraid it is a must to follow."

Tala and Kai were seated in front of the great man's great desk, looking like school children called to the headmaster's office, but for an plainly different reason.

"Please...uh...sir, couldn't there be exceptions to the rule just this once?" the redhead asked.

Voltaire shook his head gravely. "Bryan Kuznetsov is the chosen one who should remain a virgin lest we all suffer the wrath of the Moon Gases."

The bluenette among the small party raised a thick brow. "Seriously Voltaire?"

"Seriously, my dear grandson." Tala inconspicuously earned a kick for his snigger. "Of course unless this Sanguinex individual you are proposing is destined..."

"Destined?" both teens were sitting up and paying attention.

Voltaire shrugged and refused to say no more. "Try him out. If he doesn't work then try other people..."

--

"I'm WHAT?!"

"He's WHAT?!"

Robert Jurgen laughed apologetically as the rest of his team tried to calm down the Dark Bladers.

"Everything's perfectly alright!" pacified the German. "I've told you, Kai and Tala have arranged the affair. Those boys could be darlings, really..."

Sanguinex could not string his words together. "Yes, of course...my greatest gratitude...but you TOLD them?!"

"Gee, I kind of HAD to. How else would I have gotten those two to agree to this little vacation?"

"No!" the poor vampire was on the verge of hysterics. "I meant does HE know?"

"Absolutely not!" the noble said heatedly. "It would defeat the purpose of your trip to Russia!"

Several voices were protesting all at once. Lupinex, Cenotaph and Zomb were particularly terrified at the prospect of having to tag along in their best friend's more intimate affairs.

"You're afraid!" Oliver declared.

The werewolf huffed. "The Blitzkrieg are just intimidating..."

The zombie and the mummy looked at him as if he conceived a wolf cub. "Are you crazy Lupi?" said the elder of the pair. "Mere glares will have you tongue tied!"

Sanguinex inadvertently blushed. Johnny emitted a sound of annoyance.

"Don't judge too quickly, guys," reprimanded the Highlander. "You might be surprised."

"We would have loved to come with you for moral support," added Enrique good-naturedly. "But...those Russians may have suspicions."

"You mean to tell me 'those Russians' don't have initial suspicion as to why some bogus freak team suddenly visits them to hang out and get touchy-feely?" Zomb asked.

"Relax!" Robert's voice had risen to a shout.

For an awfully small number of people cooped up in one room, the noise was deafening.

"I have full confidence in assuring all of you that the other party, besides our intended target, is fully aware of our rendezvous. Now get GOING!"

True, the Dark Bladers had earlier brought their luggage, not knowing what fix they were getting themselves into.

"We'll be a train away if things hit their worst case scenario..." the French boy among them said cheerily.

The undead teens frowned collectively. "Gee thanks..."

**TBC**

A/N: count how many times I used 'gee' and say it to my face I'm losing my touch! ...enjoy!xD and ciAo...


	6. Chapter 5

A/N: yaaagh! I reached me deadline! ...ENJOY!XD

**Bryan Down Under**

_**Chapter Five**_

There wasn't any fancy shmancy welcoming tribute upon the arrival of the Dark Bladers in Moscow, not that they were expecting any and neither did Boris and Voltaire feel like spending on it.

They were still welcomed, however, with adequate pleasantries.

The big-nosed man sporting side burn had his 'I am but a friendly monk' mode; the Europeans knew better than to but it but was courteous enough not to show their smugness anyway.

Guards whisked away the meager luggage and brought it to a large, more humane sleeping chamber.

"I'll leave you young'uns to the care of my capable team," Voltaire said grandly before shuffling off with Boris is tow.

Spencer and Ian bounded over to the huddled group and welcomed them warmly. Kai, Tala and Bryan were some distance away from them in the hallway.

"You know we've never really had guests who came to visit just to hang out," the shortest Russian began conversationally. "I'm Ian." And he enthusiastically held out his hand.

Zomb and Cenotaph exchanged looks of visible relief. Sanguinex and Lupinex smiled. All four of them shook his hand and introduced themselves.

"I hope we're doing a good job," his companion added good-naturedly. "I'm Spencer. Uh, would you want to know were they're bringing your stuff to?"

"Why?" the green haired undead was alarmed. "It's not like anything bad's going to happen to it, is there?"

"One mustn't be too sure around here..." Ian said mysteriously.

His listeners stared.

"Ian!" the pastel blonde beside him scolded. "They've barely been here for an hour and you're already scaring them! I was only going to ask if they wanted to lie down after their trip!"

Laughs graced the vicinity.

"Which one of them is Sanguinex?" Tala asked Kai in low tones as Bryan jogged ahead when he saw the giant give the dwarf a noogie.

The addressed bluenette didn't answer immediately. He was staring at the newly arrived group in obvious shock.

The image of the Dark Bladers that stuck in his head was that of pale, grudge-bearing teens dressed in musty cloaks that went over their heads and past their ankles. He had NOT expected a bunch of, Kai was shy to admit, HOT boys in flimsy fitting polo shirts and khaki and blue jeans.

"Earth to Hiwatari?" the redhead was looking at him with concern.

He snapped to and said, "Check the guy with red hair."

Tala looked and raised both brows, seemingly impressed.

"Kai!"

Lupinex had spotted him, and despite the fact that the only occasion they met wasn't exactly enjoyable, he broke into a smile.

"Thanks by the way," the werewolf greeted.

"Don't mention it," Kai returned. "I hope Ian isn't being a nuisance this early already..."

"Oh no," said Cenotaph. "He's a pint of fun."

"A pint?" Bryan's eyebrow was in the air but there was an unmistakable smile on his face.

The bluenette turned to him. "Oh yeah, Tala, Bryan, meet the Dark Bladers." and he enumerated them one by one.

"Your fighting style is amazing," remarked Sanguinex.

Tala encountered trouble keeping modest. "Thank you. Ah, when did you see us play?"

"Tyson's first year as World Champion!" Zomb answered excitedly. "We ourselves couldn't play after all..."

"Why couldn't you?" Bryan asked.

"Europe was too lazy to think of entering the WC that year," the vampire replied.

"So..." Ian interjected. "How exactly do we hang out?" The latter words sounded technical on his lips.

"We walk? I hope a little cold doesn't bother any of you," suggested Spencer and everyone thought it was a good idea.

--

Amusedly enough, the small party unwittingly split in groups of two or more as they toured the snow-covered Abbey grounds.

"Are Boris and Voltaire really as cruel as the media says they are?" Cenotaph was asking the dwarf and the giant, who strolled on either side of him and Zomb.

Ian dismissed any kind of far-fetched theories with the wave of his hand. "Those two mean business when they mean it. But otherwise, they're just old men of old age making us do ridiculous things that they never got round to doing when they were kids."

"Oh really?" The zombie was intrigued. "Like what?"

The dark-haired boy thought for a moment, before a smile broke out on his face. "Aw man, Spence! Remember the time Voltaire bought two large stacks of multicolored hair dye?!"

The eruption of laughter floated off to where Kai, Tala and Lupinex were walking, some distance behind.

"You guys are amazing!" the bluenette expressed with bonafide joy. "I didn't think you'd show up looking...different..."

The werewolf frowned. "I'll take that as a compliment, Kai. Robert and his faerie troop've helped, but we can't thank you enough for what you two did."

"Please, it was our pleasure," the redhead said cheerfully. "We've been waiting for a suitor to take on Bryan. He's awfully picky when it comes to his personal issues. Has anyone told you he turns down hopeful men and women by the dozen?"

"A true hard to get..." added his fellow Russian.

The European blanched. "B-but then h-how will he...?"

Tala blinked at Lupinex's reaction but got his train of thought and casually wave a hand. "Don't worry about it. Sanguinex and Bryan seem to be getting along well."

The three teens looked behind them at the last couple compromising their jovial party. The vampire and the fur-fanatic looked like they were gossiping about something in hush hush and were chortling occasionally.

"Sang was nervous of what he and Bryan could talk about given a chance they'd actually meet." the grey-haired teen confided. "You should have seen him when the Majestics sniffed out his crush; brother was a nervous wreck. I wonder what they could be talking about now..."

To answer Lupinex's question...

Bryan could hardly stifle his laughs.

"You should've seen Kai when he was a titchy kid, Sang. His ears were so huge they were as big as his head!"

Pale Sanguinex flushed red as he struggled to contain himself.

"Oh you don't know my little brother, he still wets his bed!"

"No kidding!"

"I'm serious! And he's awake while he's at it"

"What?! He _pees_ on the bed?!"

"It comes with being half a dog."

"Tala's half dog, half bird, half plane and half stupid but I don't see him peeing on beds."

That produced another healthy bunch of muffled sniggers.

"Ooh...have you ever seen the Majestics get drunk?" the vampire offered to tell.

Bryan stared. "Those boys get drunk?"

"Sure they do! First class cognac, whisky...those kind. And those could get pretty strong too. You should've been there! We were celebrating Christmas once in Robert's house and Oliver and Enrique got so drunk they started making out on the carpet! It was hillarious!"

The fur-fanatic gave him an incredulous look. "Hillarious? How?"

"Both of them still had their clothes on and were humping backwards!"

"What?!" The outraged cry was heard amongst gleefull laughs. "You're pulling my leg, Sang. How would someone humping backwards look like?"

"You should really see it for yourself. It's way funnier."

"Invite me to one of your Christmas parties then, and let's get them drunk again. Oh and speaking of drunk, what was your first impression of Spencer."

Sanguinex thought for a moment. "I'm not sure. A mother hen I suppose. He does things to please others..."

"You're pretty accurate." Bryan's sneer made the redhead wonder. "But have you ever seen HIM drunk?"

The question got him excited. "No, tell me."

"Paired up with Ian they're one hell of a funny show to watch! Can you believe, one time they went to Boris and Voltaire's office and exchanged their clothes?"

"While they were drunk?"

"You'd know they were drunk because Spencer never really approved of doing anything that would anger the boss."

"Then what?"

"They took old man Hiwatari's multicolored hair dye and swapped that with the shampoo."

"What?!"

"Believe it! The next morning those two got an outrageous headache and an even worse beating. But it was worth being beaten up by someone who looks like a total screwed up clown!"

Sanguinex and Bryan erupted once more into laughter that caught the attention of their other fellows. The stares stopped when their sounds of joy subsided.

"You know," the Russian began. "I've never had this much fun talking to someone else before."

The vampire considered him for a moment. "I'm honored. I in turn haven't felt so comfortable with anyone else either."

He could not help but blush when the lilac-haired teen flashed him a small smile. For a moment he wanted to laugh at himself thinking back on the day he went into a panic asking Robert and the other Majestics of what topics could possibly interest Bryan without him sounding like someone being forced to strike up a conversation. The set-up could actually work. Johnny was right, the Blitzkrieg wasn't at all too daunting.

"On days you don't really have to do anything, what do you do?" the undead teen asked his companion.

"We clean the place." was his reply.

"A place this big? Isn't that...well, hard?"

"Of course there's no way we could cover the entire things for a day. Sometimes cleaning takes a week or two, but it can be fun."

"How?"

"There was this time when the bosses weren't around. Tala had a brilliant idea of making us scrub the floor naked."

Sanguinex gawked. "And you actually did what he said?"

"It sounded fun..."

**TBC**

A/N: Next chap: Bryan tells Sanguinex about the time they scrubbed the Abbey butt naked! Watch out for it! ...and please excuse any typos...enjoy!xD and ciAo...


End file.
